Marcy Hogan, who also blogs over at MariaMontessori.com, wrote a wonderfully provocative post today about Montessori and attachment parenting. Two areas of attachment parenting–baby wearing and extended breastfeeding–often come up in conversations about Montessori for young infants.
My understanding is that Montessori-trained Assistants to Infancy are taught that baby wearing limits independent movement and development of gross motor coordination, and that weaning at 6-9 months is the ideal time, again to encourage independence. Obviously (well, I hope, anyway), the theory is more subtle than this. I am not trained at the A to I level, but this is the basic idea.
I don’t really want to get into another argument about Montessori v. Attachment Parenting. I don’t think it’s a useful conversation, in the end, because parenting is, at its core, an intensely personal and intimate process of decision-making. Parenting is not regulated, it is a set of practices that evolves out of cultural values and norms. It changes as our culture changes, which I think is also important to remember. Childhood is valued much differently today than even 100 years ago, and our parenting style, at least in the United States, reflects that.
I do I think this conversation is just one more indication that as Montessorians, we desperately need to be doing more research on this. Attachment parenting is very much becoming more a part of the mainstream parenting culture in this country. If we want to reach out and expand the reach of Montessori beyond the niche that it is today, we better be prepared to explain to parents why Montessori doesn’t necessarily advocate for baby wearing or extended breastfeeding, using all the tools of empirical research we have available to us. Unfortunately, I don’t see a lot of Montessorians delving into PhD-level research that could actually tackle a challenge like this, which is really a shame, because that’s where this conversation should be happening.
You can read the full post here, and my comments here. Let’s continue the conversation. A to I trained practitioners, I would love to hear more from you!!
I have been a Montessorian now for about 9 months, and I have been an attachment parenting mom before that. AAll I can say on the issue is that it depends on the child. My first daughter was very nervous in new envoirments and around strangers till she was about 3. I wore her alot in the first year and occationally after that. She nursed untill she was two (mostly at night as she got older). My next daughter hated being in the wrap and was not as concerned with strangers. She is more outgoing though. She nursed untill she was 11-12 month, then she was done. She may have stopped sooner, but I really believe that nursing for the first year is the best thing to do for health resons. This doesnt mean that she only nursed. She ate meals with us, and everything, but she still nursed at other moments. These are just my thoughts. I think that it ia all about following the child!
Hmm…that weaning limit seems a strange thing for fostering independence, I mean weaning at that age would be something you do TO a baby, not something they would choose. It would be a rare thing, if given free access to choose, for children under two to wean themselves. It would go against their biological drive.
I have to agree that adaptation is needed. Like anything, a great idea can also be contaminated by a few misguided details. If Montessori philosophy is strong and sound it should be able to admit to an error, open itself to exploring new information/evidence, and form the correction.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that independence is something you tend, encourage and feed — it isn’t something that has an “ideal” schedule. It seems odd tome that Montessori even has such an idea as part of its principles! I’ll have to read up on the history. Perhaps the original idea was based upon restrictive practices that no longer should apply.
…that no longer should apply. Was it baby wearing really? Or was the original intent supposed to focus on and change the use of prams, carriages, chairs, playpens and other restrictive baby containers?
I am AMI Assistants to Infancy trained(0-3 years) and I just happened upon this blog and thought I’d make a few comments.
The first common misconception about Montessori for this age is the concept of weaning. It is suggested that the process of weaning START from 6-9 months(with some introductions to different tastes starting before that)–but that does not mean it must END at that time. My first child weaned herself at 12 months. One day she was just done and turned away. With my second daughter I ran out of milk around 8 months and then she bottle fed sometimes (along with increasing amounts of solid food and drinking from a cup) until about 13 months. My third child is now 13 months and is not ready to stop weaning just yet and so once and occasionally twice a day he still nurses. With help he also drinks from a cup and loves to feed himself. He is recently attempting to spear his food with a fork. Montessori is very much child-centered and therefore the “timeline” for weaning will vary accordingly. I do not actively offer to nurse him anymore, but he lets me know when he wants to. More recently he’ll skip a day so I know it won’t be much longer now….. I think the most important thing is to “follow the child” and make sure you are not doing something for the child because it is your need and not theirs.
I wore all 3 children in a Maya Wrap while I was out and about or doing chores at home fairly regularly until they could sit on their own. Having said that, I did not wear them ALL the time. The first 3-4 months they were sometimes in a bassinet somewhere nearby with mobiles or plants or the beautiful outdoors to look at or we spent time together in their room with them on their bellies strengthening their arms, shoulders and backs and placing interesting objects nearby to encourage reaching out for things. Once they could sit on their own I would still use the wraps once in a while when I was on the go and could not safely put them on the ground. Once they were walking I still used the Wrap when after walking for quite some time they would get tired enough for a nap when we were not at home. If we were at home they would nap in their bed and they would only nap in the Wrap at this point if we were out and about sometimes.
I think the main point is to be the least restrictive to the child’s movements, taking personalities and individual tastes into account. My first child liked to be swaddled the first couple months, the other two did not. My first 2 children slept on their sides or backs from birth and my third would not dream of sleeping unless he was on his belly–from day one! I used the Maya Wrap– but not constantly and used it less and less as they went into greater stages of independence. If you are not using swings, playpens, exersaucers, bouncy seats, etc…. then you are already well on your way to making the most of your child’s development of movement. If your child needs or wants to be in a wrap with you then it can be a great opportunity to observe all the things that you are doing as you go about your day. That is a good thing. But remembering to have your child spend time developing his muscles on his own is equally important for his physical development and for his sense of self, to build confidence in his own abilities and to interact with the environment on his own. There is a balance to everything and too much of anything is usually not a good thing.
For a great summary of ideas for children 0-3 visit: http://www.aidtolife.org